I have begun and erased words on this screen a handful of times already. Not because I don’t have anything to say, but because I don’t know where to begin. I typically blog closer to the end of the week, mainly because Thursday is shot day, so it is a good time to document the week which has passed. Today is Tuesday, and I am certain if I wait until Thursday, I will be so overwhelmed with my own words that I will never get started.
This past weekend turned out to be a very important one in our lives. Sunday (May 24th) afternoon Laine pulled me into his lap and began a conversation about how he had planned to wait to ask me to marry him until he is “fully” Laine. (Yes, we have had the future plans conversations prior to this event, so the marriage talk was not a complete surprise.) I asked him what “fully Laine” looks like, and I explained that to me he has always been Laine. This being said, he agreed and the conversation continued. He then explained the 15 different ways he had planned in his head to create the perfect proposal moment. The most recent plan being during our trip out of town in a few weeks…approximately 5 weeks away!
I should explain right here that there are many reasons in which Laine and I are so perfect together, but one commonality we share was very apparent during this special moment. When we each decide we want something, we go for it. The impatience takes over and all reason is lost. The ring he had picked up at the jeweler only a few hours earlier, after waiting 6 weeks for it to arrive special order, was burning a hole in his pocket.
After all the planning, thinking, and trying to find the “perfect way” to propose, he ended up doing just that. Me sitting in his lap, him putting his heart into words and me falling in love with him all over again as the nerves took him over. Needless to say, I said YES!! As of fall 2016, we will officially become Mr. & Mrs. (and yes, I am legally taking his last name.) 🙂
Remember how I said above that we both tend to let impatience take over and reason go out the window from time to time…the next part of this story solidifies that…he couldn’t wait to give me the ring and I couldn’t wait to wear it….even if it was too small.
Laine did the right thing…he had my finger sized before he placed the order. We slip the ring on my finger and it gets stuck at the knuckle. I know I should not force it…I KNOW this. However yet again all reason is lost, this ring is gorgeous and I want to wear it! With a bit of force, ok maybe a little more than a bit, it goes on and if it goes on, it will come off right?? Easier said than done.
Immediately my finger is starting to swell. I’m trying not to panic at this point. Laine is calm, at least on the outside, he knows Ill loose myself if I see him panic. We try soap, we try oil, we put my hand in ice, we try the dental floss trick, we Google tricks to get rings off fingers. Nothing is working. In fact the ring is moving less now than before. We decide that my finger is clearly traumatized at this point based on the size, color and the fact I’m nauseous at just the thought of twisting the ring one more time. So we give it a break and decide to let the finger rest over night hoping the swelling from trauma will go down a bit.
Monday morning arrives and there isn’t much change. I ice it again, and we try one more possible way of getting it off. No luck, it isn’t moving. It is inevitable at this point that we have no other option…they either have to cut the ring off my finger or my finger off of my hand. The thought alone made me sick to my stomach, but it had to be done at this point.
We traveled to Chandler to the store in which the ring was ordered through. The salesman knew Laine and was laughing at me. He took one look at my hand and he too knew there was no option. Two jewelry saws later (platinum is some hard metal!!) John (the salesman) had the ring off my finger and my finger could circulate blood properly again. Needless to say my ring is currently being repaired and UPSIZED so when I get it back it will fit properly and we wont have to repeat this experience. I’m trying to be patient while I wait for it to return to me, for we all see where impatience gets us…but it’s really hard!!
To finish off this memorable three-day weekend, we took the oldest two kids to the movies Monday afternoon. We arrived a bit early so we planned a bathroom stop on the way to our theater. Our daughter and I began to head into the women’s room, and Laine was lingering behind us with our son. Up to this point he has still been using women’s restrooms or avoiding them all together, but he was well aware that starting May 26 (today as I write this) he has to officially use the men’s room at work per HR. I stopped and looked back and he told me to go ahead. I haven’t pushed the bathroom issue one way or another as that is something Laine has to be ready for, so I didn’t argue.
When our daughter and I walked back out of the women’s room, Laine and our son were gone. I looked around expecting to see them sitting on a bench waiting for us, but they were out of sight. Next thing I know, here they come, out of the men’s room. Our son is talking a mile a minute to me explaining the experience of talking Laine into putting fear aside and using the men’s restroom. I couldn’t hardly follow the story due to the speed of his words and the surprise that it actually happened.
What Laine told me later, surprised me even more. After our daughter and I went into the restroom, Laine needed to use the bathroom but had told our son he would just wait and it would be no big deal. Our son took the initiative and told Laine to get into the bathroom and go! He walked Laine into the men’s restroom, showed him where the stalls were and then stood guard near the door. Our son never had to use the restroom at all during this entire exchange. He simply took on the roll of protector. When I heard this I had a proud mommy moment for certain. Both of my boys surprised me through this experience!!!
Hopefully the first time was the hardest and it will only get easier after that. It did happen to work out perfectly that on his first men’s bathroom trip, Laine had a 12 year old bathroom buddy to make it a bit easier. I’m so proud of Laine for taking such a big step in his transition, although I will admit I’ll miss getting to travel as a pair to the restroom from now on. Anytime I’m bummed about that, I’ll just remember that the women’s room is probably cleaner, prettier and smells better than the men’s!